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Sentence Improvement - 3 (SAT)

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Directions: The following sentences test correctness and effectiveness of expression. Part of each sentence or the entire sentence is underlined; beneath each sentence are five ways of phrasing the underlined material. Choice A repeats the original phrasing; the other four choices are different. If you think the original phrasing produces a better sentence than any of the alternatives, select choice A. If not, select one of the other choices.

I would hesitate to tell her exactly what did I think of her.

  1. what did I think of her.

  2. what had I thought of her.

  3. what did I think about her.

  4. what I thought of her.

  5. what I think about her.


Correct Option: D
Explanation:

Explanation for (1): There is error of assertive clause in this sentence. 'Tell' her' should be followed by assertive 'what I thought', not interrogative 'what did I think'.

Explanation for (2): The option does not rectify the error of assertive clause. It incorrectly changes the tense.

Explanation for (3): The option does not rectify the error of assertive clause. It incorrectly changes the preposition.
Explanation for (4): This option corrects the error of assertive clause. 'Tell' her' should be followed by assertive 'what I thought', not interrogative 'what did I think'. Explanation for (5): The option rectifies the error of assertive clause but incorrectly changes the tense.

Directions: The following sentences test correctness and effectiveness of expression. Part of each sentence or the entire sentence is underlined; beneath each sentence are five ways of phrasing the underlined material. Choice A repeats the original phrasing; the other four choices are different. If you think the original phrasing produces a better sentence than any of the alternatives, select choice A. If not, select one of the other choices.

When Jack Wilton first had come to Marois Bay, none of us dreamed that he was a man with a hidden sorrow in his life.

  1. first had come to

  2. had been coming to

  3. would first come to

  4. first came to

  5. was first come to


Correct Option: D
Explanation:

Justification for (4): This option uses the simple past tense 'came to' which is consistent with 'dreamed' in the non-underlined portion. Further, 'first' conveys the correct meaning 'in the beginning'.   

Directions: The following sentences test correctness and effectiveness of expression. Part of each sentence or the entire sentence is underlined; beneath each sentence are five ways of phrasing the underlined material. Choice A repeats the original phrasing; the other four choices are different. If you think the original phrasing produces a better sentence than any of the alternatives, select choice A. If not, select one of the other choices.

It is not easy to be sure today how accurate an observer he had been, but if we make some allowance for misprints, we find a certain consistency in his work.

  1. how accurate an observer he had been

  2. how accurate an observer had he been

  3. how accurate an observer he was

  4. how accurate an observer was he

  5. how accurate an observer he is


Correct Option: C
Explanation:

Explanation for (1): This sentence bears the error of tense. 'Not easy to be sure today' means that we are talking of the indefinite past. So, a simple past tense is required, not past perfect tense.

Explanation for (2): 'Not easy to be sure today' means that we are talking of the indefinite past. This option does not rectify the error of tense.

Explanation for (3): This sentence talks about the work done in the past for which we cannot be "sure today" so we know that we are talking of the indefinite past. So, a simple past tense is required, not past perfect tense. This option corrects the error of tense by using simple past tense.
Explanation for (4): 'Not easy to be sure today' means that we are talking of the indefinite past. This option introduces a new error. It changes the structure of the sentence by placing the verb before the subject. This happens only in a negative sentence. Explanation for (5): 'Not easy to be sure today' means that we are talking of the indefinite past. This option does not rectify the error of tense.

Directions: The following sentences test correctness and effectiveness of expression. Part of each sentence or the entire sentence is underlined; beneath each sentence are five ways of phrasing the underlined material. Choice A repeats the original phrasing; the other four choices are different. If you think the original phrasing produces a better sentence than any of the alternatives, select choice A. If not, select one of the other choices.

Not until Edward Jenner developed the first anti-smallpox serum in 1796 there was protection against this terrible disease.

  1. there was protection against this terrible disease.

  2. protection was given against this terrible disease.

  3. there had been protection against this terrible disease.

  4. was there protection against this terrible disease.

  5. was protection given available against this terrible disease.


Correct Option: D
Explanation:

Explanation for (1): Sentences beginning with negative words ought to use auxiliaries before the subject, as in the case of an interrogative sentence. 'Not until' ought to be followed by 'was there'.

Explanation for (2): Sentences beginning with negative words ought to use auxiliaries before the subject, as in the case of an interrogative sentence.

Explanation for (3): Sentences beginning with negative words ought to use auxiliaries before the subject, as in the case of an interrogative sentence.
Explanation for (4): Sentences beginning with negative words ought to use auxiliaries before the subject, as in the case of an interrogative sentence. 'Not until' ought to be followed by 'was there'. Hence, (4) Explanation for (5): Sentences beginning with negative words ought to use auxiliaries before the subject, as in the case of an interrogative sentence. This option corrects this error but sounds odd in context of the protection afforded.

Directions: The following sentences test correctness and effectiveness of expression. Part of each sentence or the entire sentence is underlined; beneath each sentence are five ways of phrasing the underlined material. Choice A repeats the original phrasing; the other four choices are different. If you think the original phrasing produces a better sentence than any of the alternatives, select choice A. If not, select one of the other choices.

He warned the government that attempts to curbing terrorism should not mean the loss of civil liberties.

  1. that attempts to curbing terrorism should

  2. that attempts at curbing terrorism should

  3. that attempt curbing terrorism should

  4. that attempts to curb terrorism should

  5. that attempts for curbing terrorism should


Correct Option: D
Explanation:

Explanation for (1): The sentence has error of the infinitive ('to curbing' is grammatically incorrect).

Explanation for (2): The option does not rectify the error, besides it introduces one more error of preposition (by using 'in' in place of 'to')

Explanation for (3): The option compounds the error by using the gerund form without the required preposition.
Explanation for (4): The sentence has error of infinitive ('to curbing' is grammatically incorrect). The option corrects the error. Explanation for (5): The option does not rectify the error.

Directions: The following sentences test correctness and effectiveness of expression. Part of each sentence or the entire sentence is underlined; beneath each sentence are five ways of phrasing the underlined material. Choice A repeats the original phrasing; the other four choices are different. If you think the original phrasing produces a better sentence than any of the alternatives, select choice A. If not, select one of the other choices.

It was because the framers of the constitution were averse of the kind of unfairness that is built into the two classes of citizens.

  1. were averse of the kind of unfairness that is built into

  2. were averse for the kind of unfairness that is built into

  3. were averse to the kind of unfairness that was built into

  4. were averse to the kind of unfairness that has been built into

  5. were averse at the kind of unfairness that is built into


Correct Option: C
Explanation:

The correct prepositional use is 'averse to'. The sentence is in past tense, so the auxiliary verb should be 'was'. And this option rectifies both the errors.

Directions: The following sentences test correctness and effectiveness of expression. Part of each sentence or the entire sentence is underlined; beneath each sentence are five ways of phrasing the underlined material. Choice A repeats the original phrasing; the other four choices are different. If you think the original phrasing produces a better sentence than any of the alternatives, select choice A. If not, select one of the other choices.

Implementing the Pay Commission recommendations have reduced absenteeism, inefficiency, job ennui among employees, and have raised interdepartmental cooperation within the various departments.

  1. have reduced absenteeism, inefficiency, job ennui among employees, and have raised

  2. has reduced absenteeism, inefficiency, job ennui among employees, and has raised

  3. has reduced absenteeism, inefficiency, and job ennui among employees, while raising

  4. have reduced absenteeism, inefficiency and job ennui among employees, raising

  5. has reduced absenteeism, inefficiency and job ennui but raised


Correct Option: C
Explanation:

Correct; removes Subject-Verb Error by using 'has' for implementation of recommendations; uses 'and' correctly to unify the three negative elements; 'while raising' provides the required contrast.

Directions: The following sentences test correctness and effectiveness of expression. Part of each sentence or the entire sentence is underlined; beneath each sentence are five ways of phrasing the underlined material. Choice A repeats the original phrasing; the other four choices are different. If you think the original phrasing produces a better sentence than any of the alternatives, select choice A. If not, select one of the other choices.

The Minister announced that the President's disease had progressed much less than doctors had expected them to, and his health will improve in the next few months.

  1. had expected them to, and his health will improve

  2. had expected and that the President's health would improve

  3. had expected and that the President's health will improve

  4. had expected it to and his health would improve

  5. had expected it and that it would improve


Correct Option: B
Explanation:

Correct; removes the Subject-Verb Error by removing the redundant and incorrect 'them', clearly defines that it is the President's health, not the Minister's that is being talked about; uses the correct subjunctive for an expected but uncertain outcome by replacing 'will' with 'would'.

Directions: The following sentences test correctness and effectiveness of expression. Part of each sentence or the entire sentence is underlined; beneath each sentence are five ways of phrasing the underlined material. Choice A repeats the original phrasing; the other four choices are different. If you think the original phrasing produces a better sentence than any of the alternatives, select choice A. If not, select one of the other choices.

You taking interest in Sam's life is not appreciated by she.

  1. You taking interest in Sam's life is not appreciated by she.

  2. You are taking interest in Sam's life and it is not appreciated by she.

  3. She doesn't appreciate you taking an interest in Sam's life.

  4. Your taking interest in Sam's life is not appreciated by her.

  5. Sam does not appreciate your taking an interest in her life.


Correct Option: D
Explanation:

Correct; uses the correct possessive verb to refer to the taker of interest; corrects the use of subjective 'she' into objective 'her'

Directions: The following sentences test correctness and effectiveness of expression. Part of each sentence or the entire sentence is underlined; beneath each sentence are five ways of phrasing the underlined material. Choice A repeats the original phrasing; the other four choices are different. If you think the original phrasing produces a better sentence than any of the alternatives, select choice A. If not, select one of the other choices.

The teacher recommended that the students should reduce play time, more practice tests should be attempted, and get back to the basics.

  1. should reduce play time, more practice tests should be attempted, and get back to the basics

  2. should reduce play time, more practice tests should be attempted, and should get back to the basics

  3. reduce play time, more practice tests be attempted, and get back to the basics

  4. reduce play time, attempt more practice tests, and get back to the basics

  5. should reduce play time, attempt more practice tests, and get back to the basics


Correct Option: D
Explanation:

Correct; the option corrects the error of importance; 'should' is redundant since 'recommended' emphasizes the importance of these steps. Also, each of the three parallel elements consists of a verb and an object (reduce- playtime, attempt- practice tests, get back- basics).

Directions: The following sentences test correctness and effectiveness of expression. Part of each sentence or the entire sentence is underlined; beneath each sentence are five ways of phrasing the underlined material. Choice A repeats the original phrasing; the other four choices are different. If you think the original phrasing produces a better sentence than any of the alternatives, select choice A. If not, select one of the other choices.

Thanks to improvements in Health Care, an average human being lives double than he used to in the Nineteenth century.

  1. an average human being lives double than he used to

  2. an average human being lives twice as much as humans

  3. life of average human being has a doubling of what it was

  4. an average human being lives twice than humans used to

  5. the average life of human beings has doubled to that


Correct Option: B
Explanation:

Correct; concise and un-ambiguous sentence conveys that an average human being today lives twice as much as humans in the Nineteenth century.

Directions: The following sentences test correctness and effectiveness of expression. Part of each sentence or the entire sentence is underlined; beneath each sentence are five ways of phrasing the underlined material. Choice A repeats the original phrasing; the other four choices are different. If you think the original phrasing produces a better sentence than any of the alternatives, select choice A. If not, select one of the other choices.

A technology originally developed for detecting stolen diamonds, called Back Scatter Technology, which has the ability to quickly scan a person without exposing him to high radiation, is finding uses in diagnoses of unconscious and seriously injured patients.

  1. A technology originally developed for detecting stolen diamonds, called Back Scatter Technology, which has the ability to quickly scan a person without exposing him to high radiation

  2. Originally developed for detecting stolen diamonds, a technology called Back Scatter Technology, which can quickly scan a person without exposing him to high radiation

  3. Originally developed for detecting stolen diamonds, now having the ability to scan a person without exposing him to high radiation, a technology called Back Scatter Technology

  4. A technology originally developed for detecting stolen diamonds, called Back Scatter Technology, which can quickly scan a person without harming him

  5. A technology that was originally developed for detecting stolen diamonds and now has the ability to scan a person quickly and without exposing him to high radiation, called the Back Scatter Technology,


Correct Option: B
Explanation:

Correct; the modifiers are all correctly placed and the sentence is clear and unambiguous; removes the wordiness of 'has the ability to' and replaces it with 'can'

Directions: The following sentences test correctness and effectiveness of expression. Part of each sentence or the entire sentence is underlined; beneath each sentence are five ways of phrasing the underlined material. Choice A repeats the original phrasing; the other four choices are different. If you think the original phrasing produces a better sentence than any of the alternatives, select choice A. If not, select one of the other choices.

Farmers fear that crop would fail if amount of rainfall in the state is fewer than 30 inches.

  1. Farmers fear that crop would fail if amount of rainfall in the state is fewer than 30 inches.

  2. It is feared by farmers that the crop in the state will fail if the amount of rainfall is lesser than 30 inches.

  3. If rainfall is fewer than 30 inches in the state, the crop would fail is the fear of the farmers.

  4. Farmers fear that crop will fail if the amount of rainfall in the state is less than 30 inches.

  5. Farmers fear that if the amount of rainfall was lesser than 30 inches in the state, crop would fail.


Correct Option: D
Explanation:

Correct; removes Error of Tense by using 'will' instead of 'would'; removes Error of Noun by using 'lesser'(Mass Noun) instead of 'fewer'(Countable Noun). "Less than" is the correct idiomatic expression to be used.

Directions: The following sentences test correctness and effectiveness of expression. Part of each sentence or the entire sentence is underlined; beneath each sentence are five ways of phrasing the underlined material. Choice A repeats the original phrasing; the other four choices are different. If you think the original phrasing produces a better sentence than any of the alternatives, select choice A. If not, select one of the other choices.

All the legislators, district and city unit presidents who attended the meeting asked the party president to make the best use of the political situation in the state.

  1. All the legislators, district and city unit presidents who attended the meeting asked

  2. All the legislators, district and city unit president who attended the meeting asked

  3. All the legislators, district and city unit presidents who attended the meeting had asked

  4. All the legislators, the district and the city unit presidents those attended the meeting had asked

  5. All the legislators, district and cities unit presidents, those attended the meeting asked


Correct Option: A
Explanation:

The sentence is correct. Hence (1) is the answer.

Directions: The following sentences test correctness and effectiveness of expression. Part of each sentence or the entire sentence is underlined; beneath each sentence are five ways of phrasing the underlined material. Choice A repeats the original phrasing; the other four choices are different. If you think the original phrasing produces a better sentence than any of the alternatives, select choice A. If not, select one of the other choices.

A Portuguese man-of-war is not a single organism, but a collection of colonial organisms made up of many minute individuals called polyps which take up different duties such as reproducing, defending the organism, acting as sail and to feed the organism.

  1. acting as sail and to feed the organism

  2. acting as sail, and to feed the organism

  3. acting as sail, and feeding the organism

  4. to act as sail, and to feed the organism

  5. to act as sail and feed the organism


Correct Option: C
Explanation:

Correct; removes error of parallelism (reproducing, defending, acting, and feeding); removes punctuation error by inserting a comma after 'sail'

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